I thought about a perfect way to begin typing this topic but as it turns out, there’s no proper manner to do this. I don’t know why I wanted to let this slip, may be because it’s been a month already. Okay, here goes.
Remember the times when you thought you might be completely lonely and the world is conspiring against you? Exactly. I go through that phase, almost every single day and everytime I get past it. I’m not saying I have a great will power or anything of that sort. I just have some really awesome yet redundant reasons. Before I begin with the story, let me tell you, all of this is a flashback, so if you think this might get annoying you may pass. And if you think you can tolerate the boredom which comes next, get on board. I will try to keep this as brief as possible.
There is no single person masquerading this story. I have been marked by many people all through my life. No, I’m not famous, nor I am great at socialising. In fact, my group is small, it keeps changing. People come, they leave. But recently, it seems there has been a pause. I found some constant parameters in my inherited class. Two years is a pretty long time and I will never be able to repay them for making it short. Thank you, if that matters even.
I met Dean, the guy who seldom updates this blog, when I started my senior high school. Things began with him, no, they were phenomena, just waiting to happen. He triggered it. I said I will keep it short so let me put it this way. We fought monsters, slaid unruly kings, discussed politics and state affairs and reigned a successful empire for a certain period of time.
I told you, it isn’t just about a single person. Next on the list comes a very unruly girl. She’s annoying and it takes a hell lot of time to make her see things for real. May be I’m a jerk and she is right, I’m a pretentious ape. I like it, her little rebellion that is. It’s awkward but I really enjoyed that royal meal with her on that peaceful garden that day.
There’s not one girl, there is another girl. Well, kind of a girl. She is my brother. And before you start typing why this is grammatically very incorrect, let me tell you, she is tough, and I hate to admit but she’s trouble for me. If you sit on the backseat, you will know why. Anyways, thank you for the ride.
I admire your patience for going through this list. There are no names, I don’t want to mention them. Let’s just say they are bits of everything I said and way better than that. My list doesn’t end here, but it’s difficult to write more. Because while I enjoyed my time in school, I forgot to hold fast to the memories. Memories like having someone who hated pranks, someone I bullied in dorm rooms needlessly, talk all my shit through without hearing them complain, end age long syllabi in a single night and so many adventures hence. There are people who even watched my journey, painted my shades, thought that I was worth their time and made me fall in love. Thank you.
It will take a while to mention these stories and I’m running short of time here. No I’m not dying. I think these memories are getting old. To put it simply, think that you had the most adorable set of companions ever and you screwed it up. Back when I joined school, I did not have friends. No, I didn’t want to make friends. But if you held my hand in this journey of stupid decisions, thank you. But you fell one step behind. We will keep this for some other time.
The point I’m trying to make is, you’re never alone. To put it another way, you are a space rock, alone floating in the vast space. You will find your belt and revolve around it with million others like you. Well, that’s the hope.
And in case, you are afraid that you are alone, hey there, you are not. I have been through this, we are never alone. May be you think so and may be they think so too but the truth is you are being struck. Struck by the thousands of other lives around you, situations, emotions, incidents, interactions. Think of it as a stimulus around which you are reacting/living all the way. I know, this sounds crap. Just think it as a pep talk, until you find your constants like I did. Just hold tight.
And if there is anything else to complain about. Go fuck the Internet over, I will find you. I look for the messed up things in the garbage.