Horoscope: A Daily Fiasco 

Horoscope. The answer to the question “what comes out of your anus daily?”

I hate horoscopes. It is pointless and makes no sense. I know millions will agree and millions will not and some will avoid the debate by saying that it isn’t important. Let me make this clear, the guys who avoid the debate, please do join the debate. You can make a difference. (Yes, I’m doing the poll version of booty call) Whatever.

Okay, the reason why horoscopes tick me off is that my family is a mad about it. My grandfather checks his horoscopes at night and early in the morning. My grandmother joins this daily habit too (Let me tell you, she is a sweet woman). Of course I cannot change their belief. My mother, however stopped me from going out today because something was wrong with the fucking daily prophecy. This, I couldn’t tolerate. Basically the reason why I’m hitting the keyboard right now. It’s been too long an ordeal. We all know how far we have come with science. It’s so obvious that even middle school students think that essay topics on science seem to be a drag.

I don’t understand it, like all the other stuff I write about. How can the positions of constellations relative to the sun, far away (millions of lightyears that is!) decide your next day’s meal? It’s fucked up astronomy. We have literally designed a brand and people have been benefiting with it. It’s high time you unfollow the franchise, guys. Seriously, stones for each zodiac? Lucky charms? What’s next, hairstyles for each?

I used to have a friend. We all do. Apparently, he used to shoot people with his boring, exaggerated talk about prophecy and daily piece of horoscope. We stopped being friends pretty soon.

People have needs. People have wishes. That’s exactly what false hopes and expectations are based on. Horoscope is a gamble that someone discovered during the dark ages. I say dark, because before that, women and ale, bitch! See, I cannot appease all segments of the society with what I write on my blog. Horoscope can do that. Just give them an equal amount of surprise and shock, tell a man he’s getting laid and then tell him he’ll be finished with it in 2 minutes. Exactly, how horoscope has been a favorite since centuries.

The way I see it, it doesn’t matter if the prediction turns out to be false. As long as, you have hope, it means a lot. It’s a sham. I can’t stop it. I can’t change what someone believes in. Now, isn’t that frustrating? The horoscope guy has got a business, a perfect plot to make fool of people and yet he will never get caught. Now that is a job with all the sweet jam.

I have no problem if people find a little positivity and hope in something I write and tell them that it is going to happen but I can’t stand false hopes misguiding people. But again, there a lot of things I can’t change.

It’s hard to accept, I know. But your future is guided by the choices you make now and I’m not advertising ‘karma’. You are on a boat alone, sailing in the vast open sea. You can either steadfast the sail and wait for the right time or let the wind sway you wherever it means to.

There is no destiny. There is no ‘meant-to-be’. Luck is the childish version of probability. Given the right permutations and combinations, you will find the most optimum results. And I’m just not talking science and maths here, I’m interjecting what people find easier to believe in. It’s logic. Sometimes you have to let go of what makes you feel better to what actually exists. There might be times, a good omen may not matter as much as the hard hitting disaster.

Stop being a puppet. Believe in yourself. Like everyone has been telling you all this while. Burn the crap the newspapers and hoots sell you. There is no stone that can earn you fortune and no pendant that can bring back what you lost. All you can do is work hard and earn.

We have evolved to the point of rational thinking. Let’s be wise men and not ruin the millennia long process of natural selection go to waste with talismans and tarot cards. Be real, we are not made to follow what someone writes and things are not supposed to happen because of random bullshit on gazettes. We are meant for something big here and I’m not bluffing.

I think I have made my point.

Thank you.

Sam

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